Real Life Experiences of a Boy Mom

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Every time I’m introduced to another Boy Mom I always smile and nod my head as if to say “Say no more, I get it.” Then there are usually a few moments of silence where we exchange thoughts in our head like, “I haven’t sat down on a pee covered toilet seat today! Hey, you neither? WINNING!”. Boy moms are kindred spirits. We are all dealing with the same grossness, hunger, and dirt that the next one is dealing with or has dealt with at some point, but don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I was handcrafted by God to be a Boy Mom and I wear the label proudly!

MOMMA’S LITTLE COWBOY

Being a Boy Mom is more of an experience than a definition and these are the 5 experiences I am most familiar with.

Boy Mom Experience #1: Farts

I think this is probably the first thing we can all relate to one another about. I’d say someone is farting in my house every 3-5 minutes, roughly. (I have more air fresheners and candles than Yankee Candle.) They will typically have 1 of 2 reactions to the farts: laughter (because inappropriate humor is embedded in boys) or they don’t skip a beat. We’re working on manners with my 5-year-old, Dane, and not farting at the kitchen table and in front of girls are included in that, but it’s been a hard thing for him to grasp. Just the other day I was holding Nolan’s (my two-year-old) arms while Marcus tried to get the thermometer under one (he’s extremely ticklish) and Dane walks up, squeezes in between myself and the hubs, farts and then walks away.

(Bonus Moment: Have you ever had to ask your son if he’s been digging in his butt? I have..)

Boy Mom Experience #2: Food

SNACK TIME

Dane is a picky eater and Nolan is trying to be that way but that doesn’t stop them from being excessively hungry. Protein shakes, yogurt, macaroni and chicken nuggets are just a few of the things I buy by the boatload. Literally, I get multiple bags of these items every week at the grocery store. Boy moms are the reason they make fifteen dozen carton of eggs at SamsClub. They can put away some food and they are only two and five. How will I ever keep up in their teenage years?!

(Another Bonus Moment: I never thought I would actually have to say things like “Can you get your toes out of your ketchup.” – but I have)

Boy Mom Experience #3: Peeing

Everything is a toilet. Beautiful rose bush, an ant pile, a toy at the playground, you name it and they will pee on it. I have had to stop Dane numerous times from peeing in the middle of the playground. He will often ask to go pee outside while we’re at home. He would rather run past the bathroom and pee outside then go to the toilet. When he does actually pee in the toilet, he doesn’t get it in there. Whether he just isn’t paying attention or it splashes up, I’m not sure, but it’s all over the toilet seat and he hasn’t mastered lifting the seat yet. About a year after he was potty trained and when he finally started standing to pee, I learned to check the seat before I sat down.

Boy Mom Experience #4: Injuries

Plain and simple, they are just going to happen more with boys. Nolan is only two and already he has had his fair share of injuries including a burn from a barbecue pit, nearly ripping his big toenail straight off, falling backwards out of a wagon and cutting his head open. They happen more often than not and there will be more.

ALWAYS SPORTING A NEW BOOBOO

Boy Mom Experience #5: Toys

I remember how I played with my toys when I was younger. I was totally content for hours with a couple barbies and my Barbie house. Oh, but that is not the case with boys. My boys, in particular, like to dump every single drawer and container and pull every last toy out of its spot, then build them all up on one another and knock it all over. There have been times that I could not even walk through Dane’s room because of the toys covering the floor. Being the neat freak that I am I just can’t fathom how he plays that way, but he prefers it that way.

Through all the pee, farts, and toys are two amazing little boys who love their Momma to the end of the universe and I wouldn’t trade this life for anything. I’ve learned that all things are meant to be explored and climbed. They’ve shown me that running through the house with styrofoam swords is actually pretty fun and dogpiling Dad is more fun. Lastly, they remind me daily not to take life so seriously and to just take it day by day. Something we so easily forget as Mom’s, Dad’s and adults.

I would love to hear about your Boy Mom experiences. Don’t be shy, drop them in the comments below!!

toddler climbing into drawer
Always climbing in or on something!

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